The moment my car passed his truck on the street I felt a million butterflies deep down in the pit of my stomach. It has been so long since we have caught up. I wonder how he is doing and I miss the old times. The times we stayed up all night talking about country music and nonsense. It didn’t matter how late it was we never ran out of good conversation.
Looking back I can’t believe I stayed up until the crack of dawn and went to work with only an hour or two of sleep at least a couple times a week. He made me feel like a teenage girl, giddy and high on lust. It was an amazing feeling until I noticed that I was drinking more and more.
Don’t get me wrong I cherished the long talks and cuddles but it started to feel empty. I loved spending time with Mr. Drunky Monkey but he was starting to forget the things I had told him the week, day even hour before. He would make plans with me and then forget all about them. I’ll admit that I like to indulge in a bottle of wine here and there. I even like to crack a beer on a nice warm day but I’ve only been completed inebriated to the point of forgetfulness a few times in my life. I knew that it was time for me to straighten up before I ended up with a drinking problem.
So, I had the talk with Mr. Drunky Monkey about straightening up and actually getting serious. I mean my children absolutely adored him. He did the sweetest things for them, like buying them extra special Halloween treats. He played with them every time he saw them and even took them on special trips to the store. He always praised me for doing such a great job as a single parent. I really felt that we could have had a happily ever after.
However, he admitted to the fact that he was an alcoholic and that he just couldn’t give up drinking. That talk hurt but it needed to be done, there was no way that I could continue in our off and on messy pattern. To be honest, it’s sad to hear that you aren’t as important to someone as you thought you were.
I wanted to help him in any way that I could but he wouldn’t accept my help. We remained friends but it got harder and harder to watch him slide down a slippery slope. In the end he ended up moving away which made my children and I extremely sad. It’s always hard to loose someone special to you.
I think a small part of me will always wonder and hope that he gets the help he needs. If I learned anything from Mr. Drunky Monkey it was that a drink will always come first in the world of an alcoholic.
I have a new found respect for recovering alcoholics. It takes a very brave person to admit that they have a problem and to seek help.