Holy Cow, Shoot Me Now!

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I have to share the details of my painful day with y’all. It might have been one of the most embarrassing days of my life, well top 10 at least but I just need to get it out of my head…

I took my daughter to the fair today. She had a blast on all the rides and enjoyed some fair food. I also let her little buddy from next door come along, so she was really over the moon. I should feel really happy that today was such a success! Instead I’m sitting here feeling like a failure. You see Miss S was excited yet scared to get on one ride in particular. It was fast and it went upside down. I decided I better go on the ride with her to make sure she was okay. This is when the most embarrassing thing of my life happened to me. When I went to get into the ride with my baby girl my hips were too large. I’m sitting in the ride thinking ouch this is going to kill me and then the ride operator comes over and says very loudly that I would have to exit the ride. Not only am I feeling disgusting at this point but I also feel like a failure to my daughter. She was scared to go without me and then here I am leaving the ride with my head held low in shame. Anxiety then kicks in after I get off the ride, the tears and negative thoughts start flowing.

I had worked my self-confidence up to a pretty high level over the last couple years. I know life isn’t all about looks. However, today shattered everything that I have worked toward. How do you explain to your children that you are afraid to try to get on the rides with them at the fair just in case you don’t fit. Honestly, one of the worst moments of my life!

Luckily my daughter loved the ride, what a brave little trooper she is. She also thanked me a million and one times for taking her and her friend out for a fun day. I’m so happy she loves me in any form and doesn’t judge me on the size or shape of my body. Today definitely serves as motivation to get back to the old me, the one that isn’t trapped inside of this body that I hate. I find it ridiculously hard to find the motivation and time to get out and get active after working a long shift and doing my mommy duties. I think it is time to hit the drawing board though and get serious about a fitness plan. I will NEVER let this kind of humiliation happen again!!

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Where I want to be! The me from six years ago!

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Where I am now! Gosh my daughter is a cutie!

IT WILL CHANGE!

 

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9 thoughts on “Holy Cow, Shoot Me Now!

  1. It broke me heart to read that 😦 I’m still somehow surprised by how cruel society can be. I hope that you really do use it as motivation in leau of letting it discourage you! Good look in your journey!

  2. You go girl!! I did it a few years ago and shed 22 kilos! I did it for me, not for society’s perception of how I should look, and I feel amazing now!! But I am still taken aback by negative comments from people who have only known me as this shape, who remark that “it’s alright for you, you are naturally slim!” Seems there will always be someone who will judge by appearance!! Good luck!!

    • Thanks! Operation get fit fatty started today πŸ˜‰ Awesome job, getting fit is hard! Doing it for yourself is the best reason for sure. The ideals of society today are seriously unrealistic anyhow!

  3. I know the feeling..I was once asked in a line up how come I hadn’t popped yet. When I looked confused the person insisted I was well over 9 months along, and she was surprised I hadn’t given “birth yet, or is it just twins making you so big” You’ll get there Tiffany. I’ll help you… πŸ˜› I don’t mind being the annoying stick up your butt to motivate you.

    • Yes!! honestly I need that!! Operation get fit fatty starts TODAY! Going to buy a scale and some health foods.

      I can’t believe someone actually said that to you! Such a cruel assumption.

      • I was totally floored. The woman looked so happy for me too…I panicked and went with it hahaha..knowing i’d never see her again I totally lied, and said it was twins and I’m due in a few weeks, I’d just gained a lot of weight. She patted my belly actually (hate ppl that do that) and went on her way..Seriously though, Operation Get Fit Fatty has started.

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